Pixel Lava Unplugged
I make non-work and even non-computer stuff sometimes too.
Inspired by the amazing work of Ramalama Creatures (check out her fantastic Instagram), I bought some Fimo and started playing around with the idea of making a little sculpture of my dog Mochi. I spent way too much time on it and ended up painting it several times over but it was really fun and gave me an even greater appreciation of Raminta's talents and photography. I have a long way to go, it really lacks the fine detail I was shooting for, but I felt like it was a strong first effort. Here's how my MiniMo turned out.
When I finished MiniMo, my best friend Eva said "Hey, that's just like the one you did of Jazzy!". I had absolutely no recollection of doing a sculpture of my previous chihuahua Jazzmin but sure enough, Eva produced the little modeling clay figure from a dusty cupboard.
I immediately remembered it. I made it after Jazzy had gone blind and it captures the open-faced stare she had when she was trying so hard to see towards the end of her life. How sweet that Eva had saved it all this time!
I had no sooner finished with Jazzmin when Eva produce a third piece. This was a dog sculpture we found at my mom's house after she died. It's made of two figures, one of which I recognized as the little terrier from my early childhood - Sugar. I have no memory of making this, so imagine my surprise when we turned it over to find my mom's handwriting on a tiny label. She was our family record keeper, so I'm inclined to accept the note as truth - "Made by Ame Stanko 1976". That would have been not long after Sugar died - and so like me to process my grief by making a little remembrance of her.
As I turned this piece over in my hands I felt humbled. The stiff, lifeless MiniMo I spent the last month laboring over was nothing compared to what my 9 year old self could make. The floppy ears, the head heavily resting, the little turned paws, the slightly up-curved tail, even the sleepy look of two puppies snuggling. It's all there. It made me laugh and shake my head in wonder. What happens to us? Are our hands divorced from our brains? Or is it the seeing that is altered? In the end, maybe the only triumph is to simply still be trying.
When I made MiniMo it was with the idea (inspired by Ramalama) of making something new. However, these forgotten gifts from past me show that I've been making the same figure (with diminishing results) for more than 40 years. There's my 1976 fingerprint on Sugar's nose and here's my 2018 thumbprint on Mochi's little chicken stick. I suddenly felt that I was not the best custodian of memory. I decided to make Eva the owner of a small diorama of all three. There is an adage that old age is a second childhood. If so, then perhaps I can look forward to improving on my 9 year old self when I'm 90.
"There is no end. There is no beginning. There is only the infinite passion of life." ~ Federico Fellini
This blog is devoted to the random tidbits I made to process emotions, make sense of the world, and mostly just to amuse myself. Enjoy!